Dear Dunkin’ Donuts

We recently sent a letter to Mr. Will Kussell of Dunkin’ Donuts. In it we said:

I recently viewed the television commercial your company is running featuring a family and their dog, being entranced by the television, only to be jolted from that state by a box of Dunkin’ Donuts.

While I applaud your creativity and agree that Dunkin’ Donuts have the magical powers you claim, we at the DogWalkBlog object to the use of the family dog being the lone victim of the television trance.

A real dog would have been able to smell your delicious product through two exterior doors, out to the driveway and through the metal of a car door. He would have been at the door, with his tail wagging in anticipation of being able to eat a Dunkin’ Donut. In short, Mr. Kussell, no self-respecting dog would allow himself to be snared in the television trance as suggested by your commercial.

We therefore respectfully request that you re-write your commercial to feature an alternate ending. If you would like to “go for the funny” as they say in show business, may we suggest the family cat? Many other brands have used the cat without any negative feedback.

We hope you will consider this notice and our subsequent request in the spirit of helpfulness in which it was offered and hope strongly that you can accommodate the request herein. If you have any further questions, I can be reached on Twitter by tweeting @dogwalkblog or through my web site at http://www.dogwalkblog.com

To view the letter as a PDF file, click here. Keep watching Twitter to see how all this gets resolved.

And now for something different…

Want to play the bagpipes? I do..

How To Play the Bagpipe

It ranks right up there with my quick lesson on playing the harmonica, for which I don’t have a video. But, here goes.

A simple scale, moving from left to right:
Blow, suck, blow, suck, blow, suck, suck, blow!

Everything beyond that is just practice.

Who are you people

Twittersheep
Twittersheep
I came across this fun little Twitter app called TwitterSheep. It runs a quick check on the profiles of folks following you. So, I created my own “flock” and this is what I came up with.

Download the PDF

Love me, love my dog? You are who your friends are? Lie down with dogs, rise up with fleas? Am I really hanging around with the like of these folks? 🙂

The Mac OS goes to the dogs

Steve Jobs, we dogs think it was a mistake to start naming the MacOS X after cats. Really, not cool.

In the interest of Think Different, may I propose a name for your next version? Snow Shepherd

MacOS X 10.6 Snow Shepherd
MacOS X 10.6 Snow Shepherd. If you look carefully, it is already up and running 😉

Blame the terrorists.. again

41nhb5qfrl_sl500_aa240_Generation Y isn’t lazy, impatient, demanding, high-maintenance and self-absorbed. They are just living life fully, in the moment, every day. Why? Because of terrorism.

Huh?

Yes, says Tamara Erickson in a recent podcast posted on Bnet.com. GenY came of age during the era of terrorism and that affected them so much that they seek to be in the moment just in case everything comes crashing down around them in a single, unpredictable moment.

Perhaps they seek to be in the moment because they have been handed everything by their Boomer parents? Perhaps they don’t know how to delay gratification. Maybe? Even just a little bit? Is there no depth to which GenY will not stoop to blame someone or something else for their failing?

There are all sorts of other tangents that Erickson goes down that are flawed reasoning. For example, she suggests that corporations give them a task, but don’t over-train them, let them figure it out. The problem there is GenY really has no skills nor do they have any sense of when a project is complete or well done. The conclusion most would draw is “If my boss has a problem with the quality of my work, he will give me feedback. Otherwise, its all good.”

Sounds like a theory being backed into a book.

What the Wii?

Wii game Petz Sports
Wii game Petz Sports
I returned from my walk this morning to a tweet from Guy Kawasaki about how injuries caused by excessive Wii play is on the rise.

I tweeted back saying people should just get a dog and walk three times a day. Then, it occurred to me that somebody may have already developed a game for Wii where you can walk your virtual dog.

Get this. A game, Petz Sports, was released last month where you can use your Wii to interact with a pet.

Just plain wrong.

Some things I know

I just got done speaking with an American Express rep to pay my bill. I had to call them because I missed the bill pay window between 3:00-7:00am where their web site will actually work to pay my bill.

It got to think about stuff I “know” to be true, even though other dogs swear they aren’t having the same problems.

I KNOW the Amex web site will not work during business hours.

I KNOW the Chase drive-through will make me wait for hours after 2:00pm on Fridays.

I KNOW the shake machine at the Burger King in Englewood will be broken.

I KNOW Time Warner will not really send someone out between the hours of 8:00-12:00am and I should just set aside an entire day.

I KNOW the only flights that ever leave on time from the Dayton International Airport are the first one and the last one of the day.

I KNOW any rental car company will not have a sub compact car available when I arrive.

I KNOW I will not be able to get out of Meijers without waiting in line at the register, even though I will have found everything I needed.

I KNOW my cell phone bill will never be what I was told when I signed up for the plan.

I KNOW the latest gadget I bought will not be compatible with anything else I own.

I KNOW that “no assembly required” really does require assembly.

I KNOW the directions someone just gave me that includes the phrase “you can’t miss it” will not actually get me where I’m going.

I KNOW portable electronic devices will have a 50lb power brick attached to the cord.

What else do YOU know that customer service reps tell you never happens to other people?

Contributed:
@Eva_Abreu via Twitter: I know that I’ll press 3, then 6, then 2, then hold for 13 min. only to get disconnected!

I am so proud to live Dayton, Ohio

In a Huffington Post article today, Steven Shehori wrote a satirical piece, claiming that 37% of Americans could not locate America on a map of the United States of America. In it, he writes a quote:

Shirley Matheson, a part-time Arby’s employee residing in Dayton, Ohio, agreed with Weiss’s assessment. “I live in the U.S.A., so why would I need to know where America is? Or the United States for that matter?”

Why pick out Dayton, Ohio specifically? Are the words “uneducated” and “Dayton” so close to each other that if you were to randomly pick out any city in America, you would pick Dayton, Ohio?

Well, ok maybe you would. I would, but I live here, so I’m allowed. The rest of your liberal pukes, quit picking on us.

Oh, and Steven, if folks in Dayton, Ohio don’t know where America is on a map, we’re not going to know what satire is either. But then, we’re probably not reading the Huffington Post.

Snickers the cat

It’s not a real blog unless there is a cat somewhere in it. So, here is my cat, Snickers.

snickers

I named her Snickers because it looks like a Snickers bar blew up in her face. She’s ok with it. She doesn’t care about much except getting fed on time and being left alone. And pet when she wants it.

She’s a cat. We argue. I win.